Training the "sub-conscious"

So many behaviors are part of our subconscious. And any one of them we need to change, we have to consciously work on it for weeks, months, years - as part of a plan !

Some change for good. Most don't. The moment the plan is over, the subconscious programming takes over. 

So, what is the effective way of training sub-conscious ? If a food pattern needs to be strictly followed, consciously - it becomes a "diet plan". And comes with a shelf life !

Any set of tough actions put in form of a plan to follow, works against the basic core nature of the living adults, the freedom !! And hence fails.

So, here is a middle path I am currently experimenting with.

"Just Watch but take no action".

What is my morning weight ? Did I lose temper any day ? Did I spend 1 hr in some form of sports or physical activity ? Simple parameters to watch in coded, compact way.

Just a daily note of gibberish that looks like MW=x, A=0, WO=1 etc. in a journal.

But no specific action or plan kicks in if MW is above a mark or below a mark. If A becomes > 0.
No plan. Just watch and document.

And month after month, I see the cumulative numbers are automatically coming closer to what the ideal values should be.

And because I am not doing any thing, I would not go back to anything !!

Perception - Why does it take so long to change ?

Ever wondered why others perception about you, persists for years even after you have "changed" you behavior ?

Very commonly found in families, organizations !!

 "Oh .. Him ?? He does not have respect for process. He is a maverick" !
".. no ! Don't invite him to the marriage. He drinks before coming in and not sure what he will do".
"You can hire this engineer, however he is a slow learner. I used to work with him in 2003".

Some snippets of opinion's about people. Over a period of time, people adopt new behaviors, learn. The core nature may not change, but externally visible behaviors, habits etc do change. But the brand of the person lingers on many years post the person shed his old skin.


So, why does it happen ? Pondering in to finding a mathematical formula, this is what I come up with (and already used in a coaching session).

When a person, cares about certain feedback, takes it seriously - he changes. He takes say 1 week to change that habit / behavior. That one week, the maximum time any one stayed with him, is he himself.

People around him, who holds that perception also need 1 weeks worth of exposure to the new behavior. But how much time they get exposed to him in a week ? 1 hr ? Then it will take them 3 yrs (24x7 hrs @ 1hr a week - converted to weeks and then to years)  to change the perception and adopt to new you.

Agree, its more complex than the super simplistic math I ve provided. 

But, I think I found the answer to the young coachee who was asking me - "How do I get rid of the old perception of "me" in the team ? "

Expose new YOU more, more time ! Over communicate ! Over display the new behavior and the change. The more, the sooner the perception will go away (and new ones will be created of course !!)